Philadelphia Cream Cheese Gets into the Console Wars With Philly Series 5

Philly Series 5

Latest News

Philadelphia Cream Cheese Gets into the Console Wars With Philly Series 5

November 17, 2020

By: Robert Grosso

 
 

Every few years, like clockwork, the release of next-generation gaming consoles aligns with the holiday season. Now, that time is here. We all know that the hottest holiday gifts this season may sell out quickly. So, Philadelphia Cream Cheese has tech fans covered, with something more delicious than any of those gifts ever could be.

A brand new console generation has begun, with Sony and Microsoft once again duking it out for dominance like this was 1993 all over again. With the Xbox Series and the PlayStation 5 already sold out on store shelves, the question on everyone's mind now is simple; how do we cash in on this?

Well, if you are a company like Philadelphia Cream Cheese, you make your own parody cheesecake kit.

Yep. A parody of a console launch for a real product. Say hello to the Philly Series 5, the world's "most delicious holiday gift and a stunning advancement in cheesecake technology." according to a press release by Philadelphia Cream Cheese.

 
 

So what is in the Philly Series 5 kit anyway?  Well, you get a specially designed pan.

"The Philly Series 5 kit comes with a specially designed pan with sleek, futuristic contours that will leave you reveling in awe at the most advanced technology in the history of cheesecake." says the press release. "And best of all, it contains the key ingredients you need to bake a cheesecake, delivering breathtaking flavor that is as delicious as it is immersive. Some highlights of the kit include five cream cheese bricks of power, ultra HD white chocolate, and the latest 3D cookie crumb technology."

As silly as it may sound, I got to give credit to Philadelphia Cream Cheese for sticking to the theme here. Piggybacking off the new iteration of the console wars and having a little bit of fun promoting a minor product is certainly one way to get everyone's attention.

Hell, it got me to write about this. 

"Nothing in the world moves faster than the technology curve, and we always strive to be at the forefront – both in our product and in the ways consumers experience the simple pleasure of Philadelphia,” said Basak Oguz, Director of Marketing at Philadelphia Cream Cheese, “The Philly Series 5 is our way of moving at the speed of innovation, and bringing consumers the most delicious gift of the holiday season.”

So, if you are a baker looking to make some lovely cheesecakes this holiday season, picking up the Philly Series 5 might be the way to go, especially considering its price is only $4.99. Anyone interested in picking up the Philly Series 5 can reserve pre-orders starting at 12PM Eastern on their official website here. It's almost certain to work better than Sony and Microsoft's preorders.

 
 

Oh, and the PlayStation 5 and Xbox Series X and S are available now, if you can find them. 

Self Photo Holding Beer
Staff Writer

A game playing, college teaching scholar who happens to write some articles every so often. Enjoys penning long-form articles that few probably read. Love the art of gaming, preservation, collecting and RPGs. Have worked as a journalist, critic, educator and blogger for over ten years now, with articles published (as user editorials) on Game Revolution and Giant Bomb as well as a contributor for the websites Angry Bananas and Blistered Thumbs. Now making TechRaptor my home.

Comments