No special news this week, Raptors. Hulk Hogan still hasn’t responded to my requests for an exclusive interview, snubbing us for Good Morning America. This is the final Roster Weekly so strap in and prepare for surprises.
Baron Corbin – Not to be confused with WWE 2K15’s lime green avenger Baron Blade.
Big E – Part of The New Day wrestling group alongside Xavier Woods and Kofi Kingston.
Bray Wyatt – For a while there Wyatt was a cult leader without a cult, but now he’s back with the family. It’s unknown whether WWE 2K16 had time to incorporate this into the game, because it’s understandably difficult to remain up to date when factions and champions can change overnight.
Brian Pillman – Last appearing for DLC in WWE 13, he likely features in Stone Cold’s historical story mode seeing as how he was part of the reformed Hart Foundation who feuded with Austin and had previous beef with the rattlesnake. All the other members have already been announced aside from Owen Hart.
Colin Cassady – Currently a tag team with Enzo Amore.
Enzo Amore – More wrestlers for the NXT roster is always a good thing if the career mode wants any chance this year.
Jey Uso – Sons of Rikishi, the Usos are a Samoan high-flying tag team and two-time WWE Tag Team Champions.
Jimmy Uso – They’re also twins. Jimmy is the pretty one.
Kofi Kingston – No he wasn’t already announced already, honest.
Konnor – One half of a tag team known as The Ascension, who look like a cross between The Legion of Doom and The Brotherhood of Nod.
Mark Henry – The world’s strongest man is 400 pounds of grade A beef.
Mikey Whipwreak – This is it, the most random wrestler to ever show up for a WWE game, especially considering Mikey Whipwreak never wrestled for the WWE. We can only guess his appearance is related to Stone Cold’s early career where the rattlesnake wrestled under the name Stunning Steve Austin, who’s also on this list.
Ricky Steamboat – A respected star working classic matches during the 80s and early 90s, The Dragon’s last appearance was WWE 2K14.
Rusev – Made it into WWE 2K15 under NXT; in the game he was basically that promotion’s final boss and has since graduated to the big leagues.
Savio Vega – Vega was Stone Cold’s first feud after being repackaged from a lukewarm moniker known as “The Ringmaster” to the bad tempered rattlesnake we know and love today.
Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley – You’re not imagining this one, she was announced before but there are earlier versions of some characters whether for story purposes or perhaps because they were available in WWE 2K15.
Sting (1999) – Sting in his prime, sporting his WCW colors.
Sting (Blonde) – If you still can’t accept a blonde Bond, I suggest mentally erasing this entry.
Stunning Steve Austin – Stone Cold’s early 90s WCW persona. Vega seemed like a decent start to the Stone Cold gimmick, but evidently WWE 2K16 takes players to almost primordial lengths to witness the birth of Stone Cold. Hopefully they stop shy of the maternity ward.
The Undertaker (American Badass) – There was a slightly embarrassing time when The Undertaker became infatuated with motorcycles and Limp Bizkit, same as me. I don’t bring it up, he doesn’t bring it up. It’s a tidy arrangement of denial we’ve got going.
Undertaker (Ministry) – Undertaker’s kidnapping and blood rituals phase. He once led a group called The Ministry of Darkness and went full-on Satan.
Viktor – The other half of The Ascension tag team.
Xavier Woods – Final member of The New Day wrestling group.
And that’s a wrap. WWE 2K16 will be releasing on the PS3, PS4, Xbox 360, and Xbox One on the 27th October for North America and the 30th of October for us unworthy Europeans. Is there someone you wanted to see who wasn’t announced? I sure could name a few. Where was Spike Dudley?!